Saturday, January 25, 2014

Will You Ever Be Prepared For Anything?

Oh life. It has its ups and its downs. Its happy times and its stressful times. I seem to trust more in God and think of Him when I am at a down or stressful time. I wish it was more of all the time that I felt like I depended on Him. I also feel like I reflect more on life when there is a time where I feel shaken. 

Every person in life has weaknesses. Every person has strengths. The strongest person you know will still be weak in one area or another. No person is completely, 100% strong. Realizing this makes you remember that no person should be placed on a pedestal. Not one person is better than another. We are all in this together, and every person is going through something, or has a struggle even if they don't show it. One simple reason why:

We. Are. Human.

Andrew and I would love to have a baby. We both get giddy over the thought of it. Well, when I am feeling good and happy, I get giddy. When I am going through something I seem to doubt that I can do it. I seem to wonder if I can handle it. I am a person still struggling with anxiety, and learning how to deal with it so that it does not hinder how great life can be. I might of thought life was different as a child, looking out and placing those people on pedestals. Thinking that life was perfect for them. It may have been the movies that made things look easy, and that it was all rainbows and butterflies. Each day I learn how wrong I was about life. I am trying to retrain my thoughts to not be shocked when something isn't ideal. I have felt this way about just about every big thing in life. When we got our dog, when we got our house, when we got engaged, when we got married. The biggest question I always ask myself when I am doing is, if I can't handle this now, how will I with a child? That pretty much scares the crap out of me. One thing I always try to tell myself is, I will never be well enough prepared for anything. I have to come to terms with the fact that I can't have everything organized and be perfect. I will never be at a place where I can honestly say, 110%, I am ready!. Why? Because this isn't a perfect world. 

We are humans, living on earth. We are not in Heaven, where everything will be absolutely amazing. More amazing than we could ever dream. Just try to think how AMAZING it could be, times it by a million, and realize God says it'll be even better than that! God never intended it be like this, but because of sin, it is. We have a long way Home. Now, let me ask myself again, will I ever be prepared for anything in life? No. Am I okay with that? Yes. This is the journey called life and God is with us every step of the way, and He will never leave us. He will lead us Home. Keep on, we're gonna make it. I know, we're gonna make it. We're just taking the long way Home.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

A Look Back

Wow what a crazy last two months. I am going to list the major events in my last two months so that I forever remember how crazy life was around this time. On November 24, 2013 I got married to my best friend! Within the next 5 weeks, we would have a honeymoon, Thanksgiving, my sisters Bridal shower, Christmas, I got strep throat, and then my sisters wedding. That was purely 5 weeks of crazy. New years hit and by the following Friday after my sister's wedding, I got all four of my wisdom teeth pulled. That makes 6 weeks of crazy! Don't forget that is all in the first 6 weeks of crazy married life! He already had to take care of me for being sick and in pain twice in 6 weeks! My surgery went really well though and I was up doing laundry and cleaning the first two days following surgery. I then ended up with dry sockets by Sunday without knowing it and didn't go in to the doctor till Tuesday. I thought the pain was normal till I really didn't think I could handle it anymore because FYI pain meds do not help with dry sockets AT ALL! Dry sockets are probably the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. Including when you go to the doctor and they fill the holes with a type of disintegrating gauze wrapped in cloves. Terrible, terrible, TERRIBLE pain. I went Tuesday morning and they did the bottom right and told me if the other one starts hurting to come in again. Welp, about an hour later the left side was in some pain and I went back in 2 hours later and they did the same procedure. Let me tell you, it was even more painful knowing what I was going in their to get done! By 6 that evening, the pain had came back in my right side, and I made an appointment to be there first thing in the morning. They had to redo the right side because some how it stopped working. Moral of this story, Wisdom teeth surgery itself is a piece of cake but those dry sockets are nothing close to a cherry on top. The great thing is, I survived! This has probably been the craziest 7 weeks of my life. Looking back, I wouldn't change a thing. I am so lucky I got to get married so close to my sister and that we could both experience married life in 2013. I cannot believe I conquered one of my biggest fears...wisdom teeth extractions. I was always so afraid of it because I saw so many terrible experiences. Even though my experience of the actually surgery was good, I would say the over all experience including the dry sockets was definitely a terrible time, BUT I DID IT! At this point, I am so sick of eating Mac n' Cheese, oatmeal, and soups. I am so ready to eat normal food. Until next week at least, I get to continue on this gross diet that I am not the biggest fan of. Again though, I did it. 

The things I have been able to handle since getting a handle on my anxiety is mind blowing. These things a year ago I would of told you there was no chance I could do any of it. I am doing these things with flying colors, and I could not surprise myself more. If anybody knows the feeling of surprising yourself on what you think you can't do, but then you do it, you know it is such a wonderful feeling of achievement. I thank God every day for the blessings He has given me. For having His hand to walk with me through the toughest time in my life. For him putting just the right people in my life during that time to help me through, and make such a difference in my life. The way I lived everyday was completely changed. I am so grateful for the strength I was given that has gotten me through anxiety and I continue to amaze myself everyday. I will forever try to help as many people as possible, wether it be somebody struggling with anxiety or someone needing help planning their wedding. I know how it feels to struggle and feeling like you are barely making it by in life. The great news I have for you though is, YOU DON'T HAVE TO STRUGGLE! Life doesn't have to be like that. My last 7 weeks were completely nuts, but I wouldn't want one thing different. I am reminded by Mandisa, that I am an overcomer and you are too.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Our Wedding Ceremony Short Film

We got a short film of our wedding ceremony today! It seems like we have waited so long for this video //it has only been 6 weeks\\, and boy was it worth it! We are so happy with the way it turned out. It couldn't be more perfect! We hired Tony and Max to capture our special day in motion and we got the video of our dreams! For those of you who don't know our story, our wedding ceremony was on the street we grew up on. I moved to Arizona when I was 3 and Andrew was my neighbor across the street. Now I am 21 and he is 25 and we started our lives together as husband and wife on that same street where it all began! I attached the short film below, I hope you enjoy it as much as we do!!! 

Brittany and Andrew from Tony and Max - Video Production on Vimeo.

//Below is just a photo so Pinterest would accept it!\\

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Dresses, Dresses, and More Dresses!

Trying on wedding dresses is so fun, just to warn all you people who haven't yet but dreamt of the day. It is totally better than how you dream about it! Now that I look back I see all the dresses I tried on, and ones I thought were my front runners, and I cannot imagine wearing them on the big day. None of them compare to the one I chose. None of them come close at all. I showed Andrew the photos after the wedding of the ones I tried on and he felt the same way, he was like wow these are ugly compared to yours! //Not that they are necessarily ugly, but none of them did the wow factor on me like the one I picked.\\ Here are the other dresses along with the one I picked. We went to a total of 3 different stores and we found my dress at Destiny's Bride. It is a Monique Lhuillier. I cannot get enough of "the" dress. I was in love since day one and still am! I want to wear it over and over again!

My dress!!!

The two I was deciding between

The front of the two I was deciding between!

All my girls (but one) with my dress!

 Trying on different shoes...
Time to make it fit me!

This is the runway photo, the dress is modeled in white, mine is champagne. 

The finished product!